Senioritis Hits Class of 2017
Disease Spreads Across WHS Campus
March 7, 2017
Filed under Local News
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Woodside High School seniors have been struck by a deadly disease. Attendance, effort, and the overall mood of the class of 2017 is dropping quickly due to this crippling epidemic.
Senioritis is preventing seniors across the Woodside campus to finish the second semester. Senior, Erica Johnson, seems to develop some of the symptoms during her first class at 8 am.
“Like, honestly, I don’t even show up, like sometimes I will but it’s only when I go to Starbucks before. Like, I think my teacher like stopped marking me absent since I would like, bring her coffee too,” Johnson said.
This debilitating disease has cut the senior attendance rate in half. Many people believe seniors are faking this sickness, but most students are in fact very ill. Even though, to some, the disease may seem like a joke or a way for seniors to get out class, the sickness is real. Alex Aguilera has spent the last two years attempting to complete her senior year, unfortunately she has been unsuccessful both times.
“I am a 5th year senior and anyone who tells you that the disease isn’t real, is wrong. I have lived through it twice now and it doesn’t get any better,” Aguilera said.
While there is a myth that only students can contract the disease, there are actually a few teachers who seem to be experiencing similar symptoms that they have contracted through student contact. Some teachers just returned to campus back from medical leave at a facility located on the Hawaiian Islands in order to learn strategies to help deal with seniors who have the disease as well as treating their own symptoms.
“Seniors are tough. Half them don’t show up and the other half are asleep and standing in the room all day with them you can contract the disease. So why not take a vacation to the Islands, I mean get medical help,” Mrs. Basik stated, as she sipped her chai tea latte.
For some students, they experience the disease without even being on campus. One student, Mitchel Sheeper, has symptoms while driving to school and can’t even make it to class.
“Every morning I drive to school, but, for some reason, as I get closer and closer, my head starts to hurt and then my stomach. Once I arrive on campus, I sit in the nurse’s office until about lunch and then make my mom call me out,” Sheeper stated.
Another senior, Ciara Lopez, has even been offered bribes by her teachers to show up to class, yet the disease prevents her from going anywhere near learning environments.
Lopez said, “My teacher and I have a deal, that everytime I show up for class he’ll buy me lunch. I haven’t exactly taken him up on his offer yet, but probably next month I’ll try to go.”
Senioritis is taking over the school and there is no hope for the class of 2017.
“Honestly, there’s no hope. Who wants to walk on a stage anyways?” Aguilera said.